4/22/09

Three For Tuesday, Part II

"Naked As The Day", "The Republic of Brooke" and "Private Eyes" have all decided that every Tuesday we're going to do a round robin question session and ask each other 3 questions. This is round #2:

  1. Describe your perfect day: Waking up late and laying in bed with a boy just talking and giggling :: brunch :: ponytail, jeans, tshirt and flip flops day :: an afternoon of big ticket shopping...not to purchase, just to dream :: beers at a dive :: home to get cleaned up and dressed up :: fancy, shmancy dinner with dancing (the romantic kind...not gettin' ma freak on) :: out for drinks and cigars (him not me) at a quiet little place so we can actually talk :: home to the bedroom where I pay him back for giving me the best day of my life.
  2. What is your favorite smell/scent and why? I have two favorite smells. The first is fresh cut grass. I love it when someone has JUST mowed their yard. That smell always reminds me that it's time to be outside. Fresh cut grasss + citronella candles + a hot grill cooking food = summertime! My second favorite smell is puppy breath! I. Love. Puppy breath. When they nibble on your nose and whine and you can smell it?! Melt my heart. SO DAMN CUTE!! If they had that in a bottle at Dillards, I'd freakin' buy it and slather it all over myself.
  3. What book is on your nightstand right now? Well, for starters...I don't have a nightstand right now. BUT...on the floor next to the couch I have two books: The Forgotten Garden by Kate Morton (currently reading, almost done) and Start Where You Are: A Guide to Compassionate Living by Pema Chodron.

4/14/09

Three For Tuesday

"Naked As The Day", "The Republic of Brooke" and "Private Eyes" have all decided that every Tuesday we're going to do a round robin question session and ask each other 3 questions. This week, I gave TRoB three questions and I got 3 questions from PE. Here they are:


  1. What is one thing that you can't go without when you're PMSing?
  2. As weird as it sounds...pickles. When PMS rolls around, I will eat them on EVERYTHING like they're going out of style. I don't know why. It's never been chocolate for me. Pickles.

  3. Name one surreal experiece you have had. why was it surreal?
  4. OK, don't make fun of me but I guess it would have to be in Miami when we met Hulk Hogan. He was sitting at the table next to us with some random guys and apparently the lure of 3 smokin' hot girls was too much for him. He struck up a conversation with us and it evolved into him talking about his family and his show. He was friendly and gracious and charming. We talked to him for about an hour. Not that I dream about meeting Hulk Hogan but to sit there and talk to him the way we would sit and talk as friends was very surreal.

  5. Name 5 things you want to do before you turn 30?
  6. MAN, that's coming up quick!
    One, get married.
    Two, have a house to call our own.
    Three, learn how to ballroom dance so I can dance at my wedding.
    Four, take a humanatarian trip somewhere overseas.
    Five, be able to look at my life and be happy with where it's at.

4/13/09

Fights, Friends, Parents, and Interviews

It was quite a weekend for me and the "Naked As The Day" crew! Spent three lovely days in Tulsa, OK with the boy and girls I love so dearly. Short recap would go like this:
  • Had more awesome sex than one person should have
  • Wolf and I had our first argument/fight/whatever...which led to more great sex
  • Dinner with what I guess you might call my "future in-laws"
  • Spent some great time with the girls I love SO much

We got off to a rocky start on Thursday night. The plan was for Wolf to take Friday off so we'd have more time together. I get there on Thursday night and he tells me he's decided to work on Friday after all. Why? Because he figured I'd want more time to spend with other people during the day on Friday. Thanks to still being tired from the night with the sisters, the emotional drain of not seeing him for two weeks and just overall being tired from a long day of work and flying...I exploded. I was an angry blubbering fool. In my mind, I came to town for one thing: to see him. What does he do? Work a complete day when I'm in town. Do you see the irrational girl thinking here? Yeah, I didn't. I was making perfect sense in my head. I finally started seeing the light of what he was saying though. There really were a ton of other people I wanted to see while I was in town. I relented and make up sex ensued.

Friday I got to have a sushi lunch with my ex co-workers. Damn the CEO for shutting us down and scattering us. I forgot how much I like those people and how well we got along and worked together. Damn him and his inability to keep a company afloat STRAIGHT to hell. I got to spend time with ALL my girls on Friday: Roomie, BFF, Queenie and D-bone. I loved EVERY minute of it! Both Roomie and BFF are dating new boys and I got to meet them on Friday night. I'm glad to report that I whole heartedly approve! Queenie and D-bone are still smokin' hot, single messes...although Queenie spent most of Friday night and Saturday crushing hard on one Mr. Mister, who graced us with his presence on Friday night. I couldn't have asked for a better time with my girls. We drank and danced our asses off Friday night. Early, early Saturday morning, laying in bed with Wolf, exhausted from a FULL day of perfection, I kissed him and told him "thank you". "For what?" he asked.

for knowing that I needed a day like today.

Saturday night, Wolfie and I went out to dinner with his mom and dad. In the midst of all the changes, plans and travel, it never once dawned on me that they would want to meet the girl that their son is so in love with that he's moving to be with. Once that hit me...I suddenly became very nervous. I had images in my head of saying totally inappropriate things, of not being able to carry on a coherent conversation and of simply not being liked by them. Wolf did his best to calm me but it didn't work very well. You know what did work? The two incredibly huge hugs I got from them when we met at the restaurant. They are totally adorable, sweet people. It's not hard to see where the Wolfman gets his mojo. It took me 12 seconds to fall in love with his dad, he's a riot. We ate at the Riverwalk and after dinner took a little stroll down the walk. Momma Wolf and I strolled arm in arm (loved that, BTW) and as we separated ourselves from the boys (who were busy smoking cigars) had the sweetest conversation. I'm not even going to disrespect her by sharing any of it here but the gist of it was she's never seen her son THIS in love and after two hours of dinner could totally see why he was.

Um...will you be my mommy?! Because you're totally awesome! I almost feel bad for having sex with your son now. (OK...not really)

Sunday was Easter brunch with some friends at The Cheesecake Factory then the boy and I wandered around the mall just being silly and goofy till eventually putting me back on the airplane to BoulderCo. It was weird coming home to and falling asleep in an empty apartment. Poor Buster Brown is still at the puppy resort till I get off work today. I'm ready for Wolf to be here.

Speaking of Wolf being here, he had a phone interview with a firm in Denver this past Thursday. It went smashingly and they told him they'd be in touch. I'm the worlds worst at getting my hopes up so I'm trying to control it... but I have my hopes up! Oh and because some of you have asked...yes, the sisters payed me back for the bail money. No hard feelings. It happens. I feel like your mom now but that's ok. :-)

Hope everyone has as great day! Time to work, poodles. Kisses...

4/8/09

Neighbors, Happy Hour, College Boys and Jail

Folks, this is a long one...so strap yourselves in.

Ok...off the bat, let me just say that I came to three realizations last night. Two of which I already knew but just didn't want to admit but now I will. Let me back up and tell you that I went to happy hour last night with my new neighbor friends: BigSis, the grad student, is 23 and LilSis, the undergrad, is 21. Happy hour started for us around 6:00 last night. I strolled in the door this morning at 3:41am. Yeah. Why, you ask? Well, let's start with realization numero uno.

Realization #1: My neighbors are NOT as sweet an innocent as they seem
They brought me wine and food and apologized for not coming over sooner. How sweet is that? As we drank a bottle of wine and got to know each other, they seemed so down to earth and laid back. Just the kind of girls I needed to be around as I try to maintain the calm, simple "No Drama" life.

Oh...smoke more crack, Skippy.

Twenty minutes into happy hour, they were TOTALLY different people. Kinda like the quiet, reserved librarian that has a couple of drinks and ends up dancing on the desk in a Van Halen video in her bra and panties. It was ridiculous. We walked into the bar and BigSis immediately set up four different kinds of shots for the three of us. I hadn't eaten anything so after those four shots I'm swimming...and not in a good way. The sisters, on the other hand, were like Coyote Ugly dancers. Tequila shots. Gone. I don't know what the next drink was but it was lime green and on fire. Slam. They order up Irish Car Bombs. Down them like they're 7-up Spritzers. At this point I'm trying to stay on the bar stool. I need food in a BAD way. The sisters look like they could wrestle bears and come out on top. Which brings me to realization number two...

Realization #2: I CANNOT hold own my against two raging collegiate alocholics
It's true. I can't. I thought I could drink but these two are phenoms. And with every drink, the college boy sharks are circling and smelling blood in the water. I finally convince them to get a table so we can get some food. The beer flows STRAIGHT thru dinner. The food helps a little but I'm so behind that it's hopeless to think I'll catch up to sobriety...ever again. They want to drive across town to another bar but NONE of us are in any shape to drive so I convince them that we should just walk down the street to a different bar. We saddle up to the bar and immediately we all have tequila shots and the sisters have another Irish Car Bomb. Then, like magic, we're SURROUNDED by frat punks. So willing to buy us shots and drinks and talk to us. I decided to nurse a beer while I try to get myself under control. I had several cute conversations with a couple of frat boys who are under the DELUSION that my panties are coming off. Their pick up lines were SOOO cute, though, and I told them that. Guys don't find that kind of comment very flattering, BTW. LilSis disappears for about a half an hour. I don't even think BigSis realized she was gone. I did. Which brings us to our third realization...

Realization #3: I've become the responsible one
Ok, that may be an overgeneralization...but you know what I mean. I realize that LilSis is gone so I do the responsible thing and go looking for her as she is in no shape to be on her own. Seeing as I know absolutely NOBODY in the joint...it's slow going. It's not a huge place, how hard can this be? NO luck though. As I'm walking back up to the bar to find BigSis and ATTEMPT to get her interested in the fact that her sister is missing, LisSis comes walking in the front door with a guy and a part of my heart breaks off because I know EXACTLY where she's been and what she's been doing. I can just tell by looking at them. She stumbles/walks up to me and give me high fives. I brush the hair out of her face and say

"I think you've had enough, sweetie."

And with that she lays her head on my shoulder and snuggles up to me like a child and says

"You're right. Can we go home?"

Keeping track of these two, though, is a little like herding cats. BigSis is nowhere to be found. I sit LisSis down in a booth and trudge off to find the other. There she is...over in the corner playing pool with a group of Chia Punks. One of them has his hands all over her in an attempt to "show" her how to shoot (we've all been there ladies, don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about). If they were naked it would have been a great porn scene. I tell her that it's time to go because her sister is hurtin' in a major way. She finally agrees after some serious convincing (this is YOUR sister, bitch, not mine). Oddly enough, the guys don't want her to leave:

Chia Punk #1: She can stay if she wants to
Chia Punk #2: Yeah, we'll make sure she gets home.
Me: Yeah, right. I believe that.
Chia Punk #1: We will.
Me: Before or after you rape her?
Chia Punk #2: hey bitch, you're not her mom. She can do what she wants.
Me: Son, don't fuck with me or you'll wake up with that pool cue shoved up your dick.
(his boys all start "whoopin" and doggin' him)

I grab BigSis, we both grab LilSis and make our way out. Chia Punk #2, under the impression that he has been CLEARLY wronged, follows us out, still talkin' trash. At this point, after seeing her sister, BigSis is ready to go too and wants nothing to do with Chia Punk. He's unrelenting, though, in his quest to get her to stay. Up till now, LilSis has been a lifeless body. She suddenly springs to life like a NINJA and gets in this guys face. She tells him to leave her sister alone and proceeds to kick him SQUARE in the balls. Not. even. lying. As our extreme misfortune would have it, there are two cops close by. Seeing the "melee" they make their way over to assist us. Long story short, Chia Punk and LilSis get taken away for public drunk and assault. I was smart enough to make BigSis walk away so the cops wouldn't associate her and I was sober enough by this point. I tried to convince them that I was taking her home but the boot to the berries was enough to push them over the edge.

So there I was...bailing a girl I barely know out of jail at 3:15 in the AM with money I really didn't have. It was a silent car ride home. I got them into their apartment, got poor Buster taken out, then crashed on my couch, fully dressed.

Welcome to Boulder, Colorado, boys and girls...

4/7/09

5 Random Questions From Brooke

So my most favorite blogger/tweeter, Brook from "The Republic of Brooke", and I exchanged five random questions with each other yesterday. Follow the link above to read her answers to my questions for her.

She sent me five GREAT questions! Here they are with my answers:

1. What's the best vacation you ever had?
Hawaii...three years ago. Spent 10 days there. We island hopped, swam with dolphins, ate my body weight in pineapple, got the BEST tan and got to make love on a beach. It was heaven.

2. Brad Pitt or George Clooney? Why?
Georgie boy, of course. He'll always be Doug Ross of 'ER' in my heart. Much more smooth than Brad and that voice could melt my panties right off. Besides, Brad cheated on his wife...with HER. Ick, dumbass.

3. Did you ever have an imaginary friend growing up? Explain.
I did! a whole group actually. They were called the little bits and they lived in the electrical wall outlets and had to use my hand as an elevator to get home. I carried them everywhere with me! For the life of me, I have no idea how I came up with that when I was a kid but it might explain a lot about me now! :-)

4. What's the best advice you can give to your 17-year-old self?
MAN...this question could be a blog post all by itself. But I guess the single best piece would be: there's gonna be a period in your mid to late twenties when you're gonna have opportunities (if you can call them that) to whore around. And I mean WHORE around. Don't do it. You're wasting yourself and you're not proving anything to anyone. Be patient.

5. Would you rather have the ability to fly or teleport and why?
Fly, so I could see the scenery! Plus you never know what they would do to you during teleportation. They'd put your atoms back together and you might have an arm growing out of your back. How do you look sexy with an arm growing out of your back?! I mean, I'm sure there's a niche market for that in the porn industry...but not for me. :-)

4/6/09

Long Cold Weekend

I've got a bunch of loose-end updates to cover so grab a blanket and a pillow...this may put you to sleep. :-)

I joined a gym last week. I had a gym membership in Tulsa but RARELY went because it was either easier just to go running or find something else to do! I figure this is the best time to try and develop a gym habit when I don't have just a whole lot of other things to do. We'll see. I went for the second time on Saturday and one of the personal trainers made a weak pass at me. Give it up, you big monkey.

It was my first weekend alone in Boulder. JRich had plans out of town and I don't really know my co-workers well enough to cold call them for dinner or drinks or whatever. I used to be deathly afraid of being alone but I figured that I've done so many things in the past month that have moved me out of my comfort zone that I'd tackle a weekend alone headfirst!

I met my neighbors yesterday. They're sisters. BigSis is in grad school at CU and LilSis is an undergrad. SWEET girls. They brought me a welcome basket that had wine and food in it and apologized for not coming over sooner. Really? We made up for it by cracking open the bottle of wine and getting to know each other! I think I finally have friends! :-)

Wolfie and I found a great new toy yesterday as well. Skype! We video chatting for over an hour yesterday. I never thought seeing someone on a laptop screen would make a difference but man...it was so good to actually SEE him while we were talking. His smile and his facial expressions made our conversation SO much better. He has a phone interview later this week with a company in Denver. Cross your fingers and wish upon a star that it goes well!

My blogger friend Brookee Brooke over at "The Republic of Brooke" and I are are swapping interview questions with each other today and we'll post our answers tomorrow and link to each other. She gave me some f'ing great questions that I can't wait to answer.

Ok, kids...nap time is over. Fold up your mats and let's go outside for recess. :-)


Enjoying the drama fee life...
-AJ

4/2/09

Home Alone

It snowed here again last night. I'm seriously starting to love snow...something I never thought I would say. Slept in my new apartment for the first time last night too. The only furniture I have right now is a couch, dining set, a TV and two lamps (one of which was here when I moved in). The TV is sitting on two milk crates that JRich and I kiped from the grocery store. :-) The rest of our furniture will be coming with Wolfie eventually. I had originally planned on sleeping on the couch till the bed arrived but lost control at Target the other day and bought one of those inflateable beds and bedding. The poor bedroom looks BARREN. Just the inflata-bed, lamp and a milk carton serving as a night stand (yeah...I took ALOT of milk cartons. Sue me.). I won't have cable or internet till Friday so Buster and I stole wi-fi from someone nearby and watched Hulu. Suckers and their unprotected wi-fi...

Buster usually sleeps with me but I had to put a blanket on the floor for him last night because the inflata-bed was NOT gonna work for both of us! Poor baby...he just stared up at me from the floor with a look of "how can you do this to me?!" I haven't had the heart to tell him that when Wolf moves in he won't be on the bed EVER again. That'll be a hard conversation...I'll have to distract him with a large supply of Doritos, his favorite.

I don't know what I'm going to do with myself this weekend. The boy won't be here, JRich has plans, Buster doesn't drink. I may have to read a book and just stay in. Haven't done that in a long damn time. Any suggestions other than the Twilight series?